Tolkien Day Graphic Mishap

Every once in a while I try out a tutorial in Photoshop that doesn’t turn out anything like it is supposed to. Normally those attempts are really horrendous. I’ve been trying one such tutorial out and while I didn’t get the results I was expecting, I did end up with something kind of cool.

When I was a kid, one of my favorite art projects was where you colored with several colors of crayons on a page, then covered all of the color with black crayon. At that point we always grabbed a coin and scraped pictures into the black, revealing the colors behind. Anyone else ever done that? Anyway, when I realized the graphic I was trying to make wasn’t going to turn out, I inverted the colors and ended up with something that reminded me of those crayon drawings of my youth.

I should note, that I was trying to make a graphic for Tolkien Day. After all, we’ve got to give props to the man who gave us The Hobbit, The Lord of the Rings and The Silmarillion. If J.R.R Tolkien were alive today he’d be 121. So…Happy Tolkien Day!

Grief and the Fangirl

Over the past week or two I’ve seen a few different posts that address the feelings of loss that some fans are feeling in relation to Richard Armitage and this fandom. More than just loss, grief has been spoken of.

When I read that I thought, surely not.

For me the word grief is attributed to how I felt when my best friend died at 18 years old from cancer. Or four years ago when one of my aunts and my father passed away within a twelve hour time period. In both cases, I felt as if the world had ended, or at least like it should have. I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. I lamented the fact that my dear friend should have had a lifetime ahead of her. I raged at the fact that if my dad had only taken better care of himself he wouldn’t have had the health problems that led to his death at 59 years old. In some senses I pulled away from my friends because no matter how much they genuinely cared about me and wanted to be there for me, they just couldn’t understand the loss. There was this aching hollow in my heart, that even now I’m not sure will ever heal completely. Sure, life goes on, but those people are never coming back and the void they left can’t be filled.

So, when I read that fans grieve in regards to Richard and the fandom, I thought maybe I had a narrow view of grief and went to look up the definition.

Grief (according to Merriam-Webster):

a : deep and poignant distress caused by or as if by bereavement

b : a cause of such suffering

I suppose I have to conceded that perhaps there are fans that do feel bereaved in deep or poignant ways. I am just having a hard time reconciling my personal experiences with grief to understand the grief of a fangirl? What does that grief look like? Surely it isn’t the bone deep ache that comes with the loss of a loved one. If it is, why? How have fans become so emotionally involved with an actor that they grieve so hard, so deeply? And I guess my real question/concern is this: Is such grief healthy?

I’ll admit that I’m also confused as I just don’t see anything to grieve over. The source of the grief seems to stem directly from the good things that are happening in Richard Armitage’s career and how that effects the fandom. We want him to be successful in his endeavors, don’t we? Like Judiang, I see the lessening of Richard Armitage’s personal relationship with his fans as an inevitability. Like Servetus, I’m very much looking forward to the influx of new fans that are sure to come, and the potential positive changes that will bring about it the fandom.

If you are grieving, I don’t begrudge you your feelings. I just want a better understanding.

Update: Because this post has been linked elsewhere, I feel the need to address something. This post was not “directed” at Judi. To me that seems to imply I was spoiling for a fight. I had a reaction to the choice of one word that prompted a lot of thought on my part and led me to this post. Judi, if you thought I was “directing” this post at you, I apologize for that.

It’s been a year!

Do you ever set out to do one thing and then do something completely different? A year ago today I started this blog with the intention of documenting my journey to healthier eating and exercise with gluten-free and tomato-free recipes thrown in for good measure. At the time, I said I’d post about anything that struck my fancy. Hence the name–Me, My Thoughts and Who Knows. As far as Richard Armitage goes, this is what I wrote in that first post:

I’m also slightly embarrassed to admit this, but I’m a fangirl of Richard Armitage. This would be clear to anyone who looked at the first few entries in my Netflix instant queue–Spooks, North & South, Robin Hood, George Gently. Then there are the audiobooks on my IPod. Almost daily I find myself lurking at blogs devoted to the man (I think I may have just delurked). Now I know if you’re an American you are probably thinking, “Who in their right mind is a fan of Richard Armitage!” I’m not talking about the US politician, but the incredibly talented and incredibly attractive British actor. So, he’ll probably be mentioned fairly frequently, because his work makes me happy.

I think there is plenty of evidence that I’ve embraced my fangirling ways in this last year. No more embarrassment for me…at least not in Cyberland. Blogging was just the tip of the iceberg as far as delurking, it turned out. Soon after I started commenting on other blogs, then came Facebook and Twitter accounts to better connect with other fans.

Looking back, I thought I’d go through and make a list of firsts that probably never would have happened without this blog, Richard Armitage and in some cases, the support I’ve felt from other fans:

1. First graphic ever
2. Animated gif
3. Attempt at writing fiction (I’m sorry about the long wait for the next chapter. I am working on it.)
4. Fanvidding
5. Participating in FanstRAvaganza 3
6. Joined with others in celebrating Armitage Day!
7. Openly admitted to how much I lust after Mr. A.
8. Contemplated the thoughts of an inanimate object.
9. Confused other fans by making a fake magazine interview.

So, about that “fairly frequently” comment. Turns out that fairly frequently meant that in a year’s time “Richard Armitage” would be tagged in almost 2/3 of all posts on the blog. I guess the name change back in February was appropriate. 😉

I want to say a big thanks to my fellow fans. Those of you who are fans of longer standing, thank you for welcoming a newbie into your ranks. To those who comment, I appreciate your thoughts, encouragement and friendship. Even if you just read, I’m glad you come around…lurkers are more than welcome, after all, I used to be one of you. 🙂

Finally, what’s a blogiversary for a blog that discusses RA without an image of the man himself?

Love This: Freddie For A Day

When I was in college there was this one professor in the religion department who had a uniform. The man wore khaki slacks, a light blue button down shirt, brown loafers and a jacket every day. The only variation was his ties, those were different every day and were always sporting some kind of funky design. This professor also took a walk at the same time each day around the campus, followed by a nap in his office.

One year, the head of the department got the wild idea to have “Be Dr. Rut Day.” That first year the department head and around 20 students showed up for classes dresses as Dr. Rut. Not only that, they accompanied him on his walk and even took a nap in his office and the hallway outside his office. It became something of a tradition that religion students got a tremendous kick out of and Dr. Rut was a great sport about the whole things.

I was reminded of this today, when I was scrolling through the feed on my RL Facebook account.Have you heard of Freddie for a Day?

Here is a link to the website, but I’ll give a brief summary. People dress up as Freddie Mercury on his birthday–September 5th–or the Friday before if his birthday falls on a weekend. Individuals spend the entire day dressed as Freddy, even going to their jobs. Unlike with the professor story, this isn’t just about fun. Freddie for a Day is a fundraiser to support the Mercury Phoenix Trust, helping AIDS charities all over the world. There is even a page on the website to aid in making your costume!

Look, even Stephen Fry got in on the action last year!

The whole concept is incredibly fun and inspiring to me. When I think about the millions of AIDS orphans and people the world over who simply aren’t educated about the disease, every little bit that people can do to help seems like a big deal. I don’t have time this year to be Freddie, but next year…I’m totally in!

But now for an Armitage tie in: How fun would it be for Richard Armitage fans to do something like this? Obviously it would be on a smaller scale–Freddie is to this day a world wide icon. But fans of RA could dress up as his various chaRActers on his birthday to raise funds for the Just Giving Charities. Imagine showing up to work as Thorin. Just a thought….