Dear Cyber Bully

Dear Cyber Bully,

What happened to make you so cruel? Did someone hurt you so badly that pain is the only form of communication you understand? Is your life so miserable that you can only find solace in the misery of others? If so, I feel sorry for you. I can’t imagine the kind of pain that would lead you to not only willfully hurt others, but revel in your success.

But here is the truth that you need to understand: Whatever happened in your past, doesn’t justify your actions in the present. Those people who hurt you aren’t responsible for the damage you inflict–you are. One day you will have to answer for the pain you have caused–because the weight of those actions is firmly upon your own shoulders.

You try to mask your vicious nature by saying you are protecting someone else. The one you are trying to protect doesn’t need your protection and even if they did…well I can’t imagine they would care for your methods.

If you disagree with the actions of others, there are better ways to voice your opinion. Remember though, that people might not agree with you–nor are they required too. You are not God and your opinions are not law. You would find the world a happier place if you could see the beauty in individuality–rather than seeking to oppress those who view the world differently than you.

Maybe you, like Lord Voldemort should “try for some remorse.” Unfortunately, you don’t even realize that you are guilty of wronging others. I pray that someday soon you will see the error of your ways–that you will make amends and join with our community in a way that benefits us all.

“Our little community” is full of smart, talented, funny and caring people. Each and every person brings something wonderful to the table. I look forward to the day you realize that the uniqueness of each individual is what makes us stronger.

But until that day, please just stay away. You’ve hurt too many people already. We don’t need anymore wounded in our ranks.

Sincerely,

Jas Rangoon

Common Courtesy

In the past I’ve been a fan of various actors. My fan experience however, only went so far as seeing movies or television shows in which the actor starred, reading the occasional interview and watching if they were going to be making a red carpet appearance.

All of that changed when I became a fan of RA. Google and I became close pals, I went out of my way to read or watch all of the interviews that were available, and I started lurking on blogs. The blogs provided me with a sense of belonging, even though I never commented. I thought to myself, “Hey, there are other people as interested in this guy as I am!”

Eventually, I started my own blog. It started out as a place to post about various issues, but morphed into being mostly about my favorite actor. Over all this experience has been wonderful. I’m made some friends and begun to spread my wings creatively.

But the last few days have made me question whether or not I really want to be a part of such a community. Maybe I’ve led a relatively sheltered life, but I genuinely didn’t expect some of the hateful things I’ve seen of late. I just wonder when we cross the line from simply expressing our opinions to being at least borderline bullies.

Don’t mistake me, I think each and every person is entitled to their opinion. And I welcome hearing said opinions. It would be ludicrous to think that we would all be of the same mind on controversial subjects. However, maybe it was the way I was raised, but I expected better. I expected divergent opinions to be expressed with a modicum of common courtesy and respect. Perhaps my vision is skewed, but some of the comments I’ve read are so vehement or so very specifically directed that to this blogger at least, they come across as personal attacks.

I’m still thinking all of this through, but I don’t think I’ll ever be participating in a fandom wide event again. There are people I know and respect, and I think they may be enough for me.